THE SPHERICAL DEMON

This is something I wrote a while ago during 'the clumsy years' when i had a series of mishaps in the kitchen. This is about when I sliced my finger cutting a cabbage.

Today was no ordinary day. It was something different. The air was fat, the light slim. A cabbage called to me from deep within the fridge, "slice me friend...make a salad." I should have been strong, walked away, ignored the layers of green deceit... but I was weak.
I reached in, took the spherical demon and placed it on the side board. Then it was the bread knife that called to me. It was as if they cabbage and the knife had it planned all along. I knew something bad would come about if I used a bread knife to cut a cabbage, especially one as evil as this one. But I couldn’t give in to the ridged persuasions of the knife and the tauntings of the vegetable...

I took the knife in my hand and set about the slicing of the cabbage. It beckoned me to try and cut the slithers finer, Much finer. There were thin slices of death accumulating on the side board but I couldn't stop cutting. Then the knife took a turn for the worse, a turn towards my middle finger. As it slid across I knew there was little hope in me keeping the finger which I had grown to love. The cabbage had spoken. I dropped the knife in a frenzy of shattered expectations. I fled the kitchen and fled the nightmare, never again would I give in to the green temptations. NEVER.

I now live to roam the world as a 9 fingered mutant. An outlaw. A freak. And a fool. Never again would I be able to shake a hang or wave goodbye, not with this shame on my shoulders. I was defeated by a 3d circle of misfortune. The cabbage won in this battle of being versus vegetable

The cabbage had gone but the hurt remained...